Alabama Jones and the Busty Crusade

Ever wondered what ex-NFL linebacker Bill Romanowski is up to these days? Well, the known steroid user who once spit in the face of another player during a game and punched a teammate out in practice has decided to begin a second career in acting. He will play a gay cowboy in the movie Wieners, about three friends who travel across the country in a hot dog shaped truck. I’m not making this up.

I signed on to MySpace today and realized that the song on my profile was “It’s Raining Men” by the Weather Girls. I have no idea who set it, nor do I have any clue how long that has been the music that plays when people click on my webpage, but I'm not especially happy about this.

For some reason, I have a natural distrust of people under the age of 30 with beards. There is no logical rationalization for this, it’s just how it is.

My friend Megan convinced me to wear roller skates to a club with her last week because it was her birthday and supposedly there would be roller skating. Being fairly toasted by the time we got there, I failed to notice I was the only guy on the small dance floor converted into a really crappy rink. After doing a sort of uncoordinated dance/skate to the tunes of Chamillionaire and others for a good half an hour, I finally became aware I was still the only dude skating. Then I slowed down enough to see the flier: “Tuesday at Sachi Nightclub: Megan and Matt’s B-Day Party! Girls bring your roller skates.” Thanks a lot, Megan.

There are few better feelings than, after watching a movie with a girl, getting back into your car and ripping a huge fart that you have been struggling to hold back for two hours.

I came across the profile of a girl on Match.com who’s user name was “Munchboxbabe.” Somewhat confusingly, she was straight.

My roommates and I recently ordered HBO (simply so we could watch the new season of Entourage) and unbeknownst to me we were given a free trial of Showtime. That is, I didn’t realize we had a free trial until the late night showing of “Alabama Jones and the Busty Crusade” mysteriously showed up on our DVR.