Mental Note to Self

I like watching Teen Jeopardy because it makes me feel smart.

My landlord has an email signature that reads his name, then "2001 California Staffing Professional of the Year." C'mon, dude, it's been seven years, let it go.

I have a friend who has a friend named Chad who is the head chef at a restaurant called The Steakhouse. That itself isn't remarkable, but I found it odd to learn that Chad is a vegetarian.

Few things bother me more than when I have chapped lips, buy chapstick one day and immediately lose it, forcing me to buy another tube of chapstick the next day. This has happened to me multiple times, and I really have no excuse. Sometimes, I'm just an idiot.

I think employers who make their employees work on Martin Luther King Day are racist.

My buddy has a dad who is an accountant and thus has knowledge of the financial info of many local businesses. One of his clients owns three pizzerias. His biggest expense: Salaries? No. Mortgage on three properties? No. It's the cheese.

I don't get why when fire alarms are low on batteries they start to beep. Doesn't constant beeping drain even more power from a depleted supply and increase the likelihood of me being killed in a fire?

I hate it when I'm taking a shower and I go out of order and wash my balls before my face.

I went to a taping of the Price is Right the other day and the studio was literally like sixty degrees. Apparently, Drew Carey is a polar bear.

I noticed today buying oranges that Ralph's had posted the nutrition information for the fruit. When I saw oranges contain a solid 28% of your daily recommended intake of fiber, I knew I had to get some big juicy ones. I love oranges and if they can really provide me with this much fiber, I need to eat more of these bady boys. So, I bought six big ones, and the total was $8.70. That's a freaking buck thirty five per orange. I immediately made a mental note that someday, when I buy a house and have my own backyard, I'm planting an orange tree.